Sometimes i just get so fed up of being patient.
For example shutting my mouth when i am really pissed or annoyed.
Throughout all these years of my life, i have never really blasted off at anyone.
Shutting my feelings in me and seal my mouth close
It's painful to confine myself to just a certain limit and not exceeding it.
That's why i salute people who can just express their feelings on the blog, facebook and in reality.
Because i just don't have that freedom to speak out.
Scare of being the topic of rumours and criticism.
All these years i have been hiding my feelings deep in me and not really expressing it to my parents and friends.
Thank you God because He knows everything and He never gets bored of listening to my prayers.
It's tough living in this world where people have a certain expectation on me and i have to live up to that.
I use to struggle with it and pressuring myself to be a good person.
Now, still struggling but not as before.
Yet, I still fear that people will critise my actions, words.
Somehow hiding how i really feel has been my so called "best thing i can do in my life"
I asked myself why can't people understand my position and how I feel?
I used to think that way, but being an attention seeker when i am down only leads to self pity. (maybe i still do)
Still, the Lord is faithful to me.
He always love me for who i am, though i may be the most disobedient kid in town, yet i know His love for me will never fail.